Friday, June 29, 2007

Go to your high school me.

I didn't know if I believed in karma until my 10 year high school reunion, which was held last weekend.

A little background, I was a shy, skinny, awkward kid who had a few too many perms, braces, and no fashion sense. I was in Advanced Placement classes and had goody goody not popular (but amazingly awesome and great) friends. I didn't drink, smoke, or do drugs (unless you count some wine coolers my senior year). Boys would ask me out as a joke or a dare, I didn't go to my senior prom.

Trust me, I wouldn't trade it for the world. I went back for the ten year reunion. It was a little daunting stepping in there by myself and facing the gauntlet, but I found my old friends and they all looked amazing. And I saw the people who weren't so nice, and they had become as ugly on the outside as they were on the inside. My 'goody goody' friends and I and all the really nice, good people were the best looking and most successful people there.

There was also toasted ravioli, and I love that.

Also, drunk popular guys who didn't pay any attention to me in high school got drunk and tried to hit on me. HA! Denied.

To all the nerds out there...just wait. :)

Sunday, June 17, 2007

I'm Still Up

I have found a new drink, called the wine spritzer and it is yum. We just took some wine and some sprite and voila, wine spritzers. The wine lasts a lot longer and rocks. Kudos to Amber for thinking up that great idea and bringing over Sprite. We took it to a friend's party.

Also we were trying to come up with a more PC name for Chinese Finger Cuffs. Ben and I were discussing and we thought "Asian Phalange Retainer" was a little better. But it's probably worse. Don't stone me. I think he won the Asian Phalange Retainers in some battle of wits with the Dave and Buster's basketball game. It was a test of skill.

Also if you are smoking pot at a party, don't make it that obvious. And do something about the smell, it is putrid. But all of a sudden I feel very laid back and am hungry.

Also Taco Cabana is the best place ever. I just ate a bean and cheese burrito at 2 am. Remind me I did this when I get to 40 and get heartburn from just looking at a burrito.

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

My Professor Goes Skinny Dipping, And Other Things I Didn't Want to Know

I'm in class, and my prof is talking about how he and his wife use Appreciative Inquiry to help their relationship.

...And they talked about going skinny dipping, massages, and calling each other Mr. Chocolate.

Still going....

And he's also a good dancer.

Monday, June 11, 2007

DIRTY! Blast From the Past 3

From: Ginsuchop Sent: Monday, April 22, 2002 12:57 PM
To: RandomGirlinTX, GetawayDriver, Kim-eh
Subject: RE: Any subject

Went to lunch and was sitting at stop light, bird pooped on wind shield right in front of my face. Almost puked. Now car is DIRTY!!!!
Got message on computer this morning that said I had 322 files with viruses that had to be fixed. Now computer is DIRTY!!!!
Bug ran out on bathroom floor this morning. It was a silverfish. A big one too, probably cause it and all his friends are eating holes in my brand new $4000 wardrobe. I stepped on it. Now my apartment is DIRTY!!!!
Just spilled coffee on desk. Now cube is DIRTY!!!!
Ok, I'm just going to go find a mud puddle and roll around in it.

From: Kim-eh
To: RandomGirlinTX, Ginsuchop, GetawayDriver
Subject: RE: Any subject
Date: Mon, 22 Apr 2002 1:01:52

My phones are DIRTY! Everyone else is out data testing a new system, b/c we have to get this data in by Wednesday, but the stupid IT ppl didn't load my phone into the system so they are DIRTY!
Want to take a nap after huge FREE lunch. We all got dessert. Wonder how much it cost? Wait, no I don't b/c I DON"T CARE! free for me.
Later Kim-eh

From: RandomGirlinTX
To: Kim-eh, Ginsuchop, GetawayDriver
Subject: RE: Any subject
Date: Mon, 22 Apr 2002 1:45:52 PM

DIRTY!!!!!!! I want to play too! This morning my pillow smelled like Pine Sol and I have no clue why. DIRTY!
I ran across a silverfish too the other day. I Raid-ed him. HE screamed "Oh no...RAID!".....DIRTY!
Sprouted another large zit on my face...DIRTY!
My house still smells like Brye's feet...DIRTY! My lunch was not free...DIRTY!

From: GetawayDriver
Sent: Monday, April 22, 2002 2:56 PM
To: RandomGirlinTX, Ginsuchop, Kim-eh
Subject: RE: Any subject

I just had to transfer gonnorhea from a little tube to an agar plate......DIRTY!!!!
Had 1 hour meeting where males just wanted to hear themselves talk.........DIRTY!!!!!
Found silverfish in my apartment, too-wore sweater on Friday with hole in the back, Jared was making fun of me b/c I didn't notice until we came back from dinner.......DIRTY!!!!
Had to pay for my lunch, although it was only $0.74..........DIRTY!!!!!!
Princess is going yet another week without any nookie, so she's taking it out on me......DIRTY!!!!!!!

Thursday, June 7, 2007

Tentacle Todd and Burnt Beans...Blast From the Past 2

I had been a single girl in Dallas for almost a month, and I went on my first date to some odd results. Ginsuchop didn't fare much better in her quest to hide the smell of burnt beans.

From: RandomGirlinTX
To: GetawayDriver, Ginsuchop, Kim-eh
Subject: Dirty!
Date: Mon, 4 Mar 2002 05:50:16

Date went as follows:
Went out to a cute little Mexican restaurant. Talked over dinner, good conversation, things are going well. It only takes us about a half hour to eat.

So, we both decided to go back to my house and watch Cops. So we are watching Cops and sitting at opposite ends of the room.

Then, out of nowhere, during the commercial break, he gets up to *stretch*, and then comes over and kisses me. I was completely shocked, but things were going well so a little kiss can’t hurt. Too bad as soon as commercial break is over, he stops and becomes completely immersed in the tv again (even though he had seen this episode before). Then the next commercial break hits, and he comes at me again.

As the first element of surprise has worn off, I realize that this guy was devouring my whole face in a sucker on a tentacle sort of fashion. Luckily, commercial breaks are not long. He shall now be known as Tentacle Todd.

I ended the date after Cops was finished. Was hoping to have intelligent discussion over criminal law system, or at least wifebeater tees and instead almost got devoured by a giant squid.

From: Ginsuchop
To: GetawayDriver, RandomGirlinTX, Kim-eh
Subject: Dirty!
Date: Mon, 4 Mar 2002 09:23:16

My weekend was relatively uneventful.
Impounded cars: 0, burnt food incidents: 1 (Editor’s note: After a night of drinking with me, Ginsuchop decided to go back to her place and cook some pinto beans. Unfortunately she passed out while the beans were on the stove. The next morning there was a putrid burnt pinto bean smell emanating from her apt. I could smell it from the parking lot), dirty boy count: 2.

Mom told me to simmer some vinegar on the stove as is supposed to absorb (pinto bean) smell, in theory. Burnt it. Now apartment smells like combination of burnt pinto beans and burnt vinegar.

Got mauled by 35-year old Italian in club who sounded just like the pepper boy from SNL. Also got hit on by Ed Burns look-a-like with shaggy hair and a plaid shirt who had very racist language.

He asked to call me sometime. Neglected to tell him that name was not in phone book as have just moved to Dallas. Oops.

Wednesday, June 6, 2007

Blast from the Past Part 1

A little background on this one....I had just moved to TX, and my long distance boyfriend had stopped talking to me period, and I had heard from more than one person he found a new little 'hookup' in the form of a girl who was far uglier. I decided to take matters into my own hands. GetawayDriver helps me rationalize my situation.

From: RandomGirlinTX
To: GetawayDriver
Subject: Confidential
Date: Thu, 14 Feb 2002 06:59:18

Is it cheating if you kiss a doctor or does it just count as preventative medicine, and do you think my health plan will cover it?

From: GetawayDriver
To: RandomGirlinTX
Subject: Confidential
Date: Thu, 14 Feb 2002 07:35:06

YOU GO GIRL!!!!!! It's not had a sore throat and he was testing for Streptococcus :)

Tuesday, June 5, 2007

An Update and Something New...

Well after my last downer of a post, it seems this week is looking much better than last week. Date guy resurfaced, my car will be ready tomorrow, I am no longer sick, and it stopped raining.

I am going to try something new. I was going through some old emails with my 3 BFFs from college, especially the ones where we had just moved our separate ways and started working in 2002. They are hilarious, so I am going to start posting them. Names and places have been changed to protect identities. Just so you can tell who's who, here is a little primer on each of us. We all have nicknames below.

Ginsuchop: Ginsuchop is the diva of the group with great fashion sense. She got a master's in Environmental Engineering and started working for an environmental consulting firm in the Dallas area. She got an apt across the parking lot from me when we first started out, so we went out all the time.

Kim-eh: Kim-eh graduated with a degree in Electrical Engineering and went to work for a telecom company in the Kansas City area. She has a fiance we will call MC Hammer at the time of graduation.

Getaway Driver: Named that because she was our getaway driver one night, and it was a SLOW getaway in her Corrolla. But she can still be my getaway driver anytime. She graduated with a degree in Biology and went to work for a Bio Tech company in St. Louis.

RandomGirlinTX: That's me. I ended up in DFW working as an engineer for a defense company.
That should be all the background necessary, let the trip down memory lane begin...

Friday, June 1, 2007

The Latest on Cars, Men, and Sickness

The good news...

It turns out that the guy that hit my car has admitted responsibility, and the car will be ready next week. I miss the Mini.

The bad news is that a nice guy I went on a few dates with seems to have disappeared off the face of the planet. He could call, but my interest wanes with each passing day. I swear the day I start to understand men will be the day Britney Spears doesn't look like she needs to be dipped in a vat of Lysol.

Yesterday was a terrible day. I woke up in the middle of the night, sweating one minute, shivering the next. I woke up to the worst sinus congestion ever. Then I pulled it together only to go to work, fall on the stairs, and right on top of my lunch.

It's been a terrible, horrible, no good very bad week. I'm thinking of moving to Australia.
If you know where that quote is from you are a rock star.